Run-a-way

This morning was rough. The boys were fighting over bakugans. I hate those things. I heard from two of our boys that they "hate being in this family" and that they "hate this house." It broke my heart, but rather than cry, I yelled at them about how lucky they are to have a family and a house. That really helped to bring the Spirit back into our home. Not. At one point, Braxton told me that he isn't coming home from school today. I asked him where he planned on going and he said "anywhere but here."

I was so sad. It reminded me of when I was about his age. I ran away. To the bathroom. For three days.

It was a perfect spot. I had a toilet. Toilet paper. I put my pillow and blankets in the tub and slept in there. I plugged the sink and dumped cereal and milk in there to last me three days. I was a run-a-way. In my own house.

But, I was so lonely. I missed my family. I missed having hugs and loves from my mom. I missed my bed, my toys, my brothers.

When we got to school this morning, I told them to fold their arms like I always do. I said a prayer. I asked for forgiveness for my poor behavior and pleaded that we would have the Spirit with us today. I told them each that I loved them. Braxton hung behind for a few extra seconds, smiled and waved. I hope that means that he is coming home tonight. I don't know what I would do without him, or without any of my kids.

Being a run-a-way isn't as fun as it might seem.