Thankful Thursday

So, call me "clepto." I've been called worse. I have a few blogs that I stalk. Don't judge me. Two of them (Shark and M-Cat) do a post every Thursday about what they're thankful for. I am stealing the idea (BACK OFF) and using it. Today. Because it's Thursday. And because I am thankful.

Here is what I am particularly thankful for today:

1. Motorized carts for the disabled. Because I am disabled, currently. Because they make a VERY loud beeping sound EVERY time I back up... just in case you didn't notice a big 'ole cart with a big 'ole basket on the front that is bright red backing up. Safety first. Also, because they don't fit between ANY of the display racks, or mirrors, or isles, or anything else. I know this because I rearranged Target's departments with a few turns of the beeping cart. Crash one took out the boy's clearance rack. Turn two took out the women's clearance rack. Turn three almost took out a child, who then tried to steal a VERY important microphone (which I will get to later) from my VERY large basket on the front of my VERY loud, big and difficult to steer cart. Thankful.

2. Microphones. With batteries and antenna. These come in handy when you are rolling/crashing down the isles of the toy department and would like to have a personalized tour via Emily with the microphone. This allows looks from complete strangers wondering why two thirty-something year old women, with a combined twelve children, are acting like they are eleven. These microphones, with batteries and antenna, also come in handy when disabled folk (ME) are stuck between a mirror and another WELL-placed display rack full of clothing. "Paging Emily! Emily, I am STUCK! Emily, can you hear me?! I am stuck!" Thankful.

3. Practice. I knew yesterday that I would be going tanning today. We were all very concerned that Emily would have to get my naked chunk of flesh into and out of the bed. No one was as concerned as the owner of this naked chunk of flesh. So, I practiced. Getting in and off the couch. Same thing, right? NO!! It was harder than you may have thought, but practice makes perfect and it was a flawless entry and exit. Thankful.

4. Reverse. When I came out of tanning, dressed (you're welcome), I saw my chauffer, named Emily, sprinting (RUNNING REALLY FAST) across the parking lot to her car. I thought for sure she was ditching me. GREAT! I was quite happy when I saw her splash in an extra large puddle in her flip flops. Serves her right, I thought, as I tried to figure out a plan to get this chunk of flesh home. But, to my delight, and glee, she put that beautiful maroon Sienna in reverse and picked me up on the curb. Thankful. Really. You don't want to see this chunk of flesh REALLY angry.

5. Field Trip letters home. Colton got his field trip to the zoo letter sent home today. Obviously, the people who sent this letter home five days prior to the field trip don't have children living at home. I love hearing every five minutes the exact outfit Colton will be wearing and "how much longer til I get to go?" I have four more days of this and I am really excited for that. Thankful.